Lindsay Lohan came into my life, when I watched the Parent Trap. I knew from that day I should have been a twin.
I would make my childhood friend Ellie wear the same outfit as me and convince ourselves we were fooling our parents with our very similar identities. Ellie however grew to 5’10 so It didn’t work out.
The tickets were on sale for £15 for the upper circle so I quickly purchased a couple for Jess and I. I knew in my gut I would be upgraded anyway.
Jess was running late with work, so I strutted down to the box office to collect my tickets.
“ah Mary Newnham, you have been upgraded”
“I know” I said smoothly.
So there Jess and I were in our row D stalls seats and a bag of freshly made macaroons which she had made the night before.
She managed to rescue a few from her boyfriend, Sherlock:
The show started and it was a quarter of the way in when Lindsay strolled on stage. the little fan girl of me wanted to squeak with excitement. Jess leaned over to me and whispered
“don’t you feel like shouting..your mum’s chest hair.”
which if you are not in my generation, is a quote from Lohan’s most successful film: mean girls. yeh you may have had Diane Keaton but hey ho.
her face was shiny… like she was an apple.. which had been buffed. Apparently Botox does that to you.
Now the actual play, I know her acting has been critiqued for being like an A Level performance. It’s not that bad..though the coffee making didn’t convince us. The other two actors Richard Schiff and Nigel Lindsay carried the show, minus the on stage fight which wasn’t “stalls-friendly”
To be fair, it was hell of a lot better then fatal attraction (which you can read about here)
as it the play itself was written better and the directing was stronger. On top of this we managed to leave the theatre without Jess having all her things locked inside this time. (read here)
We went to eat olives and drink wine like we english people do:
(doesn’t it seem every sitting ends like this until the fatter one unsuccessfully halves it?)
That Bloody Mary 